The Face of Adversity: The Death of a Daughter (Nicola Sherriffe): A Mother’s Prodigy

As I sat there watching the families and friends file into the viewing area, everyone greeted each other with love and affection; lots of smiles before they moved toward the casket with Nicola Shertiffe. This is what we all came for. The lovely white casket sat in front of the small chapel in front of approximately 70 chairs, mostly empty. We only had half an hour to view the body, after which the building would be closed.

Everyone seemed to arrive around the same time. However; I couldn’t help but notice a common reaction of family and friends as they viewed the face of Nicola Sheriife; expressions of gloom, pain, stress, and distress.

The deceased’s father (Garfield “Sampson” Sherriffe) walked in; he was a few steps ahead of me and walked towards the foot of the caskets to get a good look at Nicola: a person who was his living daughter two months ago. He seemed to withhold a colossal gush of tears as his twisted face questioned the reason for his loss. His eyes squinted but fully welled up. I didn’t ask, but it seemed he was looking at her for the first time in her current state. Disgusted and disappointed, he painfully walked away to the front of the reception area to take comfort with a little girl and spent the rest of the evening chatting and hugging her. I think with that, he was preventing a total breakdown.

The cousins, nieces, and nephews all filed in one by one. As they walked away, you could hear the sniffles, see the uncontrollable tears, red eyes, and flushed, pain-filled faces all twisted in disbelief as Nicola’s body lay there lifeless and unaware.

Sadness quickly filled the room within a few minutes

When Jenicy Brown (Nicola’s mom) walked in, the biggest concern. (as I observed her actions) to her as she hurriedly made her way to the casket was, “Does my daughter look well enough for her next journey? She stood there close to the face of her deceased daughter, viewing and fixing the things that were out of order; her hair and dress. At the same time, Jenicy chatted with another family member as they stood over what was once her daughter.

Suddenly she stepped to the foot of the casket as if to take a better look at Nicola. She stood there in a daze for about 3 minutes. In what seemed like a long stare, Jenicy appeared to hear no one for that brief moment. She was focusing on her daughter and thinking. Suddenly she returned to the conversation of the four other individuals who had joined her next to the casket. She was no longer dazed but seemed more in control after those few minutes.

Dad was nowhere close. He had left the room and was now outside, where he had complete control of his disposition. But Mom stood there longer. It made sense; however, men were generally afraid of showing their feelings openly. Strange, however, what I saw next was understandable but still unexpected. From what I learned about Nicola, she was a businesslike and take-charge kind of person who attended to everyone’s welfare as if they were her own. She got it dead-on from her mom, but I was unsure.

Mom seemed to be comforting everyone who walked up to the casket. We all mourn differently, but Mom’s strength, will, and composure as she calmed the family and friends inside that room was incredible. She was patting, hugging, and offering comforting words. I was concerned because she had not yet shown any signs of weakness I expected. She was more concerned about the guests and family members and ensuring her daughter was ready for her send-off.

I had not seen Jenicy Brown or Garfield Sherrife for over 40 years. I followed the many posts on Facebook after their daughter’s death and listened to the many persons I interacted with since I came to Albany, New York, for the funeral. Though I didn’t know Nicola personally, it’s as if I did, however. Jenicy was depicting all those similar traits I learned about her daughter, strong woman, caring, business-like, philanthropic, loving friends, will go the extra mile, and family-oriented.

Nicola Sherriffe died at age 46 in Jamaica of cardiac arrest. No parent wants to outlive their children. This reality is a devastating shock to the entire family, but I feel I was experiencing the life of Nicola, who she was, by observing the qualities of her mom.

Mom left the area of the casket for five minutes. By then, all who were scheduled to arrive for 30 minutes were present. I imagined she was at the front, greeting, welcoming, and appeasing everyone. After the funeral director announced that they were about to close the viewing, Mom returned to the casket, stood there and looked at her daughter, and said to her,” Nicola, I love you, my baby; I will take care of your daughters.”

She turned around and walked again in my direction. This time she noticed me sitting there. Unexpectedly she turned, and it may be the first time she had seen me since earlier in the afternoon at her home. She quickly snapped out of her painful last promising words to her daughter and smiled when she recognized I was sitting there. She stopped, held my hand, and asked, ask. Are you ok, Leo? I smiled back, but in my heart, I confirmed my suspicion: Nicola must have been the prodigy of her mom.

Funeral arrangements:

https://www.slmclaughlinfuneralhome.com/obituary/Nicola-Sherriffe